Missing Deadlines

I really wanted to go to winter investiture today. I was kind of gung ho about going to fight in the tourney really. Technically I am all set to fight, but I don't have an authorization card required to fight at events, and my non fighting garb is not done (I don't have pants lol).

**continued**

Well, thats not true, I do have pants, but they are the complete opposite of what would be period for me. I could have gone in my generic setup (some of which doesn't fit me anymore) but that would be contrary to what I want to do this time around. It is important to me to look the part. I got a recommendation for using some leftover material I have, but the piece that was in question is about 50 years off from my persona. That would be like wearing a disco outfit to a sports bar today.
I guess I am really just rolling this all around in my mind. Should I have gone anyway, just to be there? Am I setting my goals incorrectly? I want to play, but I want to do it with a greater sense of accuracy than I had years ago. Maybe I just need to relax, work on stuff as I can, and make the events as I can.
There was a possibility that I would have been part of the Princesses Guard, in which case I would have had to be there. But since I'm not doing that, I realize that its better this way. Instead of going to events out of obligation to my position, now I am going to events to be a geek with my other geek friends. That is what this year is about. Regardless of the small details that I am missing out of my kit, I will still make an effort to have fun with my friends. So far, it looks like we might have four fighters going to events together. That is damn near our own fighting unit.


Thus ends this stream of consciousness ramble post...